Healing Attachment Wounds & Rebuilding Connection
Understanding Attachment
Attachment is the blueprint for how we connect, love, trust, and feel safe with others. It forms early, created by our relationship with our caregivers, family environment, and the emotional messages we received about closeness, comfort, and needs. When these early experiences were inconsistent, overwhelming, or unavailable, we adapt in ways that helped us survive. Later in life, these adaptations can become sources of pain, conflict, or loneliness and result in anxiety or depression.
Attachment therapy helps you understand those patterns with compassion, not blame. It creates space to explore how your past shapes your present and how you can build relationships that feel more secure, grounded, and connected.
What Are Attachment Wounds?
Attachment wounds are not necessarily dramatic events but emotional moments that occur consistently where needs were misunderstood, minimized, or unmet.
Attachment wounds can develop from:
Emotionally unavailable or overwhelmed caregivers
Feeling responsible for others’ emotions
Growing up in conflictual or unpredictable environments
Not receiving comfort during distress
Feeling criticized, judged, or invisible
Being shamed for emotions or needs
Early loss, separation, or trauma
These experiences quietly shape how you learn to trust, protect yourself, ask for support, and relate to closeness.
How Attachment Wounds Show Up in Adult Life
Attachment patterns affect how we:
Handle conflict
Ask for what we need
Cope with stress
Trust others
Navigate intimacy
Regulate emotions
Experience love and connection
Signs You May Have Attachment Wounds
Feeling "too much" or "not enough" in relationships
Being drawn to inconsistent partners
Repeating the same relationship struggles
Difficulty setting boundaries
Fear of vulnerability
Difficulty relying on or trusting others
Feeling unseen, unheard, or misunderstood
Emotional shutdown or overwhelm
Confusion about your needs or identity
Attachment therapy helps make sense of these experiences so they no longer run your relationships from the background.
Anxious Attachment Patterns
Fear of abandonment
Worrying about relationships or overthinking interactions
People-pleasing or over-functioning
Difficulty calming down during conflict
Needing reassurance but feeling guilty asking for it
DO YOU RECOGNIZE YOURSELF IN ANY OF THESE PATTERNS?
Avoidant Attachment Patterns
Pulling away when things feel too close
Difficulty expressing needs or emotions
Feeling safer alone
Internalizing stress rather than seeking support
Feeling overwhelmed by others’ expectations
Disorganized Attachment Patterns
Feeling torn between wanting closeness and fearing it
Trouble trusting your sense of safety
Sudden emotional shifts
Fear of losing control
Confusion or distress in relationships
These aren’t flaws, they were often developed as adaptive strategies to keep us safe in our early relationships.
How Attachment-Focused Therapy Helps
Healing attachment wounds happens in relationship through safety, attunement, and connection. In therapy, we explore your patterns with curiosity and compassion, not judgment. I use an integrative approach incorporating elements of:
Relational Psychodynamic Therapy
We explore how early relationships shaped your internal world, your beliefs, fears, and ways of coping.
Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)
We explore and learn to access the primary, vulnerable emotions beneath the protective strategies, helping you to respond instead of react.
Narrative Therapy
We examine the stories you’ve carried about love, trust, responsibility, and worthiness and create space for new ones.
Attachment Repair Through the Therapeutic Relationship
The relationship with the therapist is its own corrective experience allowing for the experience of consistency, safety, and emotional attunement that can help to rewire old patterns.
What Attachment Therapy Sessions Look Like
Together, we may:
Identify your attachment style and patterns
Explore how past experiences shape current fears and reactions
Understand what triggers shutdown, panic, or pullback
Build emotional regulation tools
Learn how to communicate needs clearly and honestly
Process attachment wounds with compassion and softness
Strengthen your capacity for closeness, trust, and mutuality
The goal is not to change who you are, it's to help you feel more secure, connected, and at home in your relationships.
Who I Work With
I support adults navigating:
Attachment wounds from childhood or past relationships
Loss of a parent during childhood
High-achieving but emotionally exhausted lifestyles
Fear of abandonment or intimacy
Anxiety, avoidance, or confusion in relationships
Cycles of conflict or misunderstanding
Healing after breakup, betrayal, or loss
Identity and self-worth challenges
Patterns of choosing emotionally unavailable partners
Difficulty trusting or being vulnerable